I decided I’d actually write a blog post. I took a long, long break because someone told me my writing wasn’t funny. I always thought I was pretty funny, so that comment really, really hurt. It shouldn’t have, I should have thicker skin than that. But I also figured that my life has been easily summed up in status updates and, if anyone really wanted to hear what was up, they could call.
But I feel like writing again. If I’m not that funny, my kids are, and they do funny things. I was driving with Mark and telling him how long these summers seem to be. They seem to take about a year to go by. But remember the movie “So I Married an Axe Murderer”? Steven Wright’s character is flying the cop in a plane and says the line “I have no concept of time.” I totally relate to this. Last week feels as far away as last year. Likewise, a card game with friends 14 years ago feels the same length away as the card game we played with a different set of friends this past New Years Eve. But that’s a tangent. Suffice it to say summers seem long.
Which led Mark to say how much harder the summers will become when Jill gets into school full-time (still a year away.) And I said, “Well, then they’ll be more grown up. Do you realize Ben still wants me to pour his cereal for him every morning?”
It’s true. The boy is 7 years old and still wants his mother to pour his cereal and milk. I’ll ask him why he can’t do it himself and he says, “It tastes better when you do it.” So every morning he’ll come into my room and he’ll say, “Mom, can you get me some breakfast?” And just about every morning I’ll say, “Do you know what kind of cereal you want? No? Go into the pantry and choose your cereal. … Go back to the pantry, GET OUT the cereal and put it on the counter. … Now go get a bowl and spoon out of the drawers. …. Now get out the milk. … Now pour the cereal in the bowl and pour the milk on top.” “NOOOO!!! That’s the part I want you to do!!!”
Often I just do it (it’s just easier that way). But occasionally when he is forced to perform this hard labor himself, he’ll lay across the lazyboy and watch cartoons all morning and forget to feed himself. And THEN, he will realize he’s hungry later and we have to deal with the fridge being constantly open and the pantry continually raided. But he just joins his brothers in those happy forages, so hey. The kitchen is always in upheaval, I spend a fortune in groceries, the kids are tan and their hair is blonder. There are 34 days until school starts.
A couple more things:
Josh busted his head open on a rock, his staples are coming out in a half hour.
I’m no longer Young Womens President, I’m now Primary Chorister.
Mark and I were Pa and Ma on a Pioneer Trek and got to dress up as pioneers and had 8 children, ages 14-18 in our family – 4 boys, 4 girls. We had to cook our food in dutch ovens and hike about 21 miles pulling a handcart. It was awesome.
The younger three went to a Vacation Bible School a couple weeks ago where Jill learned to yell a bible verse at the top of her lungs. Making me worried about what would happen at Primary the next Sunday. Also she would bust out with “JESUS IS LORD!!!” and she got such a great reaction the first time she did it (I collapsed in hysterical laughter) she kept doing it over and over.

4 comments
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July 12, 2010 at 4:31 pm
Joy
Who the heck said that you’re not funny??!! DOn’t worry, some people don’t get my husband Pace’s sense of humor either, but I find it RATHER hilarious so there you have it! I can honestly say that your blogging again is a breath of fresh air. How I’ve missed it! Very funny, honest, and entertaining.
July 12, 2010 at 6:50 pm
Tracey
Does my google reader deceive my eyes? Whoo hoo! It’s “Honk if you love peace and quiet”!
I hope that this is the beginning of your return to blogging! Well, I think you are funny, so blog for us who think you are funny because we are probably WAY cooler than that other commenter, right, Joy?!?!
July 12, 2010 at 7:03 pm
Jen
Stephanie — We’ve never met. I’m Eric Berg’s wife, Mark’s cousin on the T side. Yours was the first blog that I followed because it always had me laughing. Your kids ARE hilarious. Like Joy and Tracey, I hope you start blogging again too. I miss those laughs!
July 13, 2010 at 9:00 am
rebecca
Not funny… you must check your resourses..glad you back..love to read about ya!! Love the VBS songs..my girls went..and we laugh so hard at Reagan who love to belt out Jesus Rocks..amen sister..amen!!!